When I became a mother I discovered this whole other new side of me.

I found my voice advocating for the safety of my son. I found my strength as I navigated boundaries with family. And I also discovered a new level of anxiety, fear, and rage I didn’t know I could contain in this one body. I cover this in episode 10 if you haven’t listened yet.

The mother inside me, who waited a long time to be born alongside Everett, was someone I didn’t recognize.

She’s already taught me so much and I honestly can’t wait to see what’s in store.

Lisa Gajda joins me on Myth of Motherhood this week and talks about how motherhood changed her.

The non mom Lisa was/is kind of a jerk?

Here is the evidence we have…

…she’s a New Yorker.

…she gave people with kids a really hard time and was judgey about motherhood.

…she says she would push an 80 year old on the street.

She’s driven, she’s smart, she’s successful.

She had a successful 30 year career on Broadway before deciding at age 41 she wanted to become a mother.

This tough as nails, pounding the pavement, dancer, fighter, warrior suddenly discovered the mother inside her.

This mother is patient.

This mother definitely wouldn’t push an 80 year old.

This mother is in awe of the magic that is creating life. However that shows up.

And while she may still be kind of a jerk (she’s really not though), her positive perspective on becoming a mother at 44 and 49 through the use of an egg donor and IVF is the best.

Her humor, her perspective, her brilliance are not the only reasons I love her.

Her full embodiment of the fact that there is no one right way to do any of this blows me away.

I guess a 30 year career in musical theater will strengthen your “I don’t care what you think, I got this” muscles.

And as we go through big transitions in life there is a new version of ourselves we didn’t know what was there. It’s important to take time to get to know the new you.

The version that was lying dormant inside you waiting for the perfect time to reveal herself.

Like everyone, I love the quote from Forrest Gump, “life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re gonna get.”

And in the same vein I would like to add that we are like flowers. We start as buds and as time passes and seasons change we open petal by petal until we are in full bloom.

And when we think we’re done? Another bud shows up on our stem. At the perfect time. In the perfect conditions for this bud. Snuggled in tight and waiting patiently to open petal by petal.

Lisa is now a therapist in training working at an LGBTQ+ affirming group practice in the flatiron district.

Resources: 

• Follow Lisa on instagram @justmakidsyo
• Download your FREE guide to the 20 Things No One Tells You About Pregnancy and Postpartum, visit www.alissa-alter.com.
• Join our private Facebook community Mom’s Club for the community of like minded, intentional moms hanging out in a 100% judgement free zone you’ve always dreamed of.

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